Wandom Wednesday: Recovery

This Sunday, my little snugaboo will be one month old. WHOA Nelly Furtado! I am torn between wishing time would stand still so I can have this little newborn forever, and wishing time would fast forward to the point where he can wipe his own butt. I'm sure one day I'll miss wiping his butt... one day.

GAH! Just the other day his little belly button cord fell off. I was both excited and disgusted, then I cried because he's growing up so fast. This was a big moment for the whole family.

I have to be honest and say that these past few weeks, although filled with magical moments, has been an emotional roller coaster for me. Baby blues hit me like a freggin' hurricane and I sobbed uncontrollably EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I heard crying sounds coming from my own mouth that I've never heard before. Even Baby Joaquin was like "What the hell, Mom! Why are YOU crying?" When I am in these deep holes of emotion, I often wonder if I'm cut out for this "mom gig." Hubby really had to dig me out of some really dark moments and there were even times I pulled him right down there with me. I felt so alone even though I was surrounded by everything a woman could ever want out of life. Dammit Hormones! I really had a difficult time with breastfeeding, getting up every 2 hours, going out in public, and even interacting with friends and family. I just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep for a redonkulous amount of days.

Then I remembered I AM a mom now and this little guy is counting on me. I remembered that newborns can pick up on mommy's stress and I couldn't deal with the thought of ruining my kid's life already. There will be times for that...like showing the video of his first bath at his 18th birthday party in front of all his friends and his stupid girlfriend, who I'm sure I'll hate. So in true obsessive compulsive and teacher lady form, I started a plan of action.....an IEP (for all you teacher friends out there)for myself to fight the blues.

1. Organize....in a cute organizer.

Ummm, I'm TOTALLY obsessed with my new planner. If you're into the good ol' paper organizers, check out ErinCondren.com. Her planners are so cute and functional. I am in organize heaven! I made it a point to plan out family walks, visits from friends, and simple trips to the market so I can feel productive. Those were the things that made me feel "normal."

I also love my Baby Daze tracker. Totally unnecessary but helps the OCD monster in me to keep track of every poop and pee that lil' man makes. That info will make for beautiful keepsake moments, no?



 2. Don't be a Vampire Slug

People say to sleep when baby sleeps but when I did that, I felt like a vampire slug living in a dark house with the curtains always drawn shut. I needed to get some fresh air everyday. My little family and I went on our first walk around the block days after Joaquin's birth. We all loved it, especially Sonic. This helped with my sanity and my c-section recovery.

3. Take a damn shower

Since my c-section, my incision site open once. Lovely. I had to take a trip to the ER, they drained it, and told me to sponge bath myself for a few days. Sponge baths are hard if you don't have a nurse on hand to wipe you down the correct way. Sure I have a husband, but it is too early in my life for him to wipe my butt. When I got the green light to take a full shower, I danced...carefully, with joy. Showers are your friend and you should take one...even if it lasts a whole 2 minutes.

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 4. Do what's right for YOU

-cracked and bleeding nipples
-nipple shields
-Lanolin cream
-Thrush
-Plugged Ducts

If you plan on breastfeeding, make sure you do your research on these things. I really thought that breastfeeding would be as easy as slapping the baby on your teet and letting him go at it, create a magical bond, blah blah blah..... no. Nobody told me that breastfeeding can be so hard!

I am a firm believer in "Happy Wife, Happy Life." Same goes for being a mom, too. If mommy isn't happy, then all hell will break loose in the house and everyone will be miserable. One struggle I had, and continue to have on occasion is breastfeeding. I want to write a full post about my battle with this, but in short, I had to do what was right for me. It seems like right now, the push is for breastfeeding and anything else is poison apparently. I felt the pressure hardcore and had to find ways to come to terms with what works for me and what wont drive me up the wall. In a nutshell, I hate breastfeeding...yes I said it...I hate it. I decided that the best thing for me right now is to exclusively pump and supplement if I need to.

 5. Cookies

Remember when I said I'd post the recipe for the pumpkin white chocolate chip cookies...yeah well, I had a baby and I totally forgot. Mommy brain? Better late than never.
FYI- I subbed the pumpkin spice and puree for a lazy can of pumpkin pie puree and I nixed the frosting and dusted it with powdered sugar.

Yummy recipe here!

I also did a my first TIM TAM SLAM! Oh, it's a thing. Google it. It's going to be big like Gangnam style. Mark my chocolate faced words.

For all you new mommies out there.... hang in there. It does get better. Atleast that's what everyone keeps telling me.

Joaquin's Birth Story

Every mother has their birth story hell that they like to tell over and over....this is mine.

November 9, 2012

Throughout the week leading up to Joaquin's birth, I tried absolutely everything to induce my labor. It was week 40 and I was ready to see my litte Baby. I tried walking, eating pineapple, eating spicy foods, bouncing on my yoga ball, and yes, even sex. All were enjoyable, but didn't work one bit. Everyone kept telling me to be patient and to walk it out and that only made me more irritable because I was wobbling around like a fat seal. I didn't want to be pregnant anymore!

40 weeks and 3 days pregnant

7:00pm- Hubby and I decided we would go on one last date night and relish each other's company. We decided on Thai food (maybe a spicy curry would do the trick?) and movie night, Skyfall looked pretty bad ass.

At dinner, I started to feel some contractions, but I was having Braxton Hicks all week long and didn't think much of it. After dinner, they started to get a little stronger, nothing I couldn't handle, and a lot closer, about 4-6 minutes apart.

8:10pm- As we settled in our seats for the movie, the serious pains started to hit. I could barely shovel popcorn into my mouth and I knew that was a sign. I whispered to Hubs that I was going to the bathroom and would text him if we needed to leave. I spent about 20 minutes pacing the halls and sitting on the lonely benches when I finally gave Hubby the text.

"Ok, come out now."

9:00-11:30pm- My plan was to try and labor at home as long as I can. We live 5 minutes away from the hospital so I knew this was do-able. I spent the next few hours bouncing on the ball, cuddling with Sonic and my hubby, taking warm showers, and watching Mrs. Doubtfire on the tube.

12:00am-This was the point where I couldn't take it anymore. We calmly gathered our things and headed to the hospital. Turns out birthing balls don't fit in the car. We left it behind. We also called our families and they hurried over to wait for Baby to come.


They say that when you're having REAL contractions, it will take your breath away. This is true. Getting from the parking lot to Labor and Delivery took a lot of stops. Each time a contraction would hit, I'd curl up in pain and beg for Hubby to help me. These pains were no joke.

When we got to Labor and Delivery, the doctor checked me and I was only 4 cm dilated and my contractions were growing further and further apart. The pain was still fully intacted though. Nonetheless, they told me to walk around the hallway for an hour to speed things up.

2:35am- Walking helped, my body responded, and I was finally 6 cm. They finally admitted me and we crossed our fingers that everything would go quickly and smoothly.

I should've crossed my toes because from that point on, it neither went quickly nor smoothly.

4:00am- By this time, I was wailing for the epidural. It turns out contractions make you forget everything you've read about, all the Lamaze class tips, and any sort of breathing techniques. Fuck the breathing techniques! I needed the drugs. Oh GOD, I was THAT girl. I am proud for making it all the way to 7 cm without one, but that was only because it took them that long to send the anesthesiologist. Side note, the lady that put my epidural in was a complete meanie. She was impatient and rude. One rude person can ruin your whole experience. Shame.

But, her drugs kicked in and shift changes happened. I got a new anesthesiologist who was a sweetheart and a wonderful nurse and felt much better both emotionally and physically. Hubby and I managed to relax and get in a few catnaps.

6:30am-Doctor came in to check me and I was still sitting at 7 cm. He told me it wasn't good for my body to be contracting for so long without progress and advised me to let him break my water and put in an internal monitor to track my contractions better. I agreed. So much for letting things happen naturally.

8:30am- Still no change so they started me on pitocin to make my contractions closer together. By now my epidural was wearing off and I asked for them to up my dosage. I couldn't believe I was asking for MORE drugs.

For the next few hours, I went in and out of naps, talked out my feelings with my hubby, and watched him struggle as he tried to put a ponytail in my hair. It was then I realized two things, if we have a daughter and she needed him to fix her hair, she would be screwed, and I love my husband more than anything in this world. He was my rock through this whole thing. He has enough strength for the both of us and he did everything he could to make things good for me. I am nothing without him.

12:00pm- finally at 9.5 cm. It was almost time to push. Our family was in the waiting room cheering me on and I was so excited for this to be over. Oh no, Joanna....it's not over yet.

Both sides and all siblings were there.

1:00pm- Time to push! Suddenly, I was so emotional and scared. I cried hystarically to Hubs and was literally shivering with fear. I was scared of the unknown. I ended up pushing for 2 hours straight. Baby would come down and go back up with each push. It was so exhausting. They could see it taking a toll on my body and upped my dosage (again) and let me rest for an hour.


3:00pm- When we started up again, the doctor finally said we needed to try something else. She tried the vaccuum. I never wanted to resort to that, but in the moment, I just wanted my baby out. It didn't work. By then, I was getting a fever and my body was not cooperating. They gave me antibiotics and rushed me to the OR for an emergency C-section. Part of me was sad that I had to get a c-section but I was happy knowing that THIS WAS IT. I was going to see my baby.

The next hour was a blur, mainly because I was drugged up. I could barely keep my eyes open and that made me sad because I wanted to be alert and awake to welcome baby into the world. We told the doctors to tell us right away if it was a boy or girl. This created quite an excited buzz with everyone and added to our surprise at the end. Hubby held my hand as I cried and then it happened, Joaquin was born. When we heard "It's a BOY!" Hubby and I cried. I've never seen Sergio cry. This was so special. He already loved his son so much. It was so emotional for the both of us.

One thing I felt sad about was the absence of the skin to skin right away. I had to wait a few minutes to even see Joaquin and that broke my heart. I didn't even get to hold him until later because I was so drugged up from the surgery. I also ended up hemorraging, which prolonged everything as well.

On the bright side, Joaquin was healthy and that's all we could ask for. He is finally here.

My recovery was definitely challenging and I'll write another post about that soon, but as of now, things are good. Getting used to being a mommy is...taking some getting used to, but I have my husband by my side and a new son to call my own. Ain't life grand?

10 Months of Pregnancy?

So how come nobody told me that you can technically be  pregnant for 10 whole months? I think someone mentioned it to me but I thought they were cracking a joke.

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How come nobody told me NOT to be pregnant in the summer? I think there should be a law prohibiting women  from being in their third trimester during a heat wave. The swelling, the hot flashes, the uncomfortable belly band sticking to your outtie of the bellybutton....I am shocked I haven't killed someone by now.

How come nobody told me to stay away from the LA County fair? Between the ridiculously large and in charge corn dog I stuffed into my mouth and the kettle corn I shoveled into my pie hole, I would be flabbergasted if my poor baby didn't come out weighting enough to get us into the Guinness Book of World Records.

How come my fear of labor and delivery is taking over my life? Between the episiotomy talk and the risk of baby swallowing his or her own poop on the way out, I'm thinking that Baby will have to live inside Mama's womb for the rest of his life. I have a million other fears but for some reason those popped out first.

.via. AlexaKitchen.com.

I am in the stage of my pregnancy where I feel pretty miserable. I am the frazzled, waddling, swollen, angry pregnant woman who is crying in pain day after day. The only thing that cheers me up besides ice cream, is the thought of holding my sweet Baby in my arms and laughing at these days of uncomfortableness. I realize that I'm truly blessed and have a miracle inside of me. As I type this, all the feelings of fear, anger, and pain melt away. I can do this.

Look how much I've grown!!

How far along? 34 weeks which is about 8 1/2 months. Whoa.  

Maternity clothes? If I could, I would live in my yoga pants. I haven't mustard up the courage to wear them to work though.

Stretch marks? I am up to 3 whole squiggly lines on my ever growing hips. I feel like a woman.

Sleep: I'm knocking out hard at first then waking up several times during the night. This is making for hard mornings. Gotta get used to it right?

Best moment this week: Taking my maternity pictures with the AMAZING Eddie and one of my favorite people in the whole wide world Nancy! Can't wait to post their amazing work.

Miss Anything? Being able to move.

Movement: All day every day, Baby is on the move!

Food cravings: If it's bad for me... I'm craving it.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Eating all the bad food...yet it doesn't stop me. Shame.

Gender predictions: I'm getting more predictions that it's a girl. Hubby had another dream it was a girl, too.

Labor Signs: Braxton Hicks are starting to roll in.

Symptoms: Swelling and itchy feet, fatigue, and mood swings.

Belly Button in or out? Out

Wedding rings on or off? Off

Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody and stressed from work If you can't already tell, I was crying before I took this picture. Probably at something really stupid, too like..... I can't see my toes anymore.

Looking forward to: Our baby showers! So excited to spend time with friends and family and to Ooo and Ahhh and cute things for Baby.

30 Weeks and How I Broke the News to Family

Don't worry, we didn't wait until 30 weeks to tell our parentals. It just took me 30 weeks to tell this story. I'm so timely, aren't I?

When hubster and I found out we were expecting, many emotions swirled in my worried little head. For awhile there, all I could think about was the chance of miscarrying. I just thought this was too good to be true. I'm a worry wart in that way. This worrisome thought made me question how long I really wanted to wait to tell the people that were close to me. On one hand, I didn't want to tell my family the news just in case something were to go wrong, but on the other, I would need their support and I would WANT their support if something did. So, we decided to go ahead and tell them. I wanted all the love I could get at that moment.

The Set-up: Sergio and I decided we would tell our families over a fancy dinner at one of our favorite places, Panda Inn. (Their Honey Walnut Shrimp is Orgasmic.) It isn't uncommon for our families to meet together for dinner a few times a year, so they didn't really suspect much. We had to tell my brother on another night because he was working. Boo, responsibilities.

The Props: For our mothers, we placed two pacifiers in ring boxes. Who would ever think that anything but jewelry would be in those purdy velvety boxes? They sure didn't. For the dads and siblings, we found cute bibs to gift to them. For Sebby, we bought him a toy that he would later be able to play with his first cousin. We presented each gift in a fancy $1 Target gift bag.

The big happy moment: Before the wonton soup was served, we thanked our families for coming and began to thank our parents for all the love and support they gave us through the years. We told our families that to show our appreciation, we bought them gifts. To throw them for a loop, we told them that they couldn't say that the presents were too expensive and we said these gifts couldn't be returned.

Our moms opened their ring boxes first and to my surprise, my mom started jumping up and down and screamed like a little girl. (I didn't expect her to scream) My MIL cried sweet tears of joy.

Our dads and siblings all beamed with happiness and showered us with hugs.

And Sebby didn't know what to make of the scary fact that a baby was in my belly. We tried explaining it to him in all sorts of ways, then he got distracted with the toy.

Then the Honey Walnut Shrimp was served and I got distracted.... it was a perfect night.

About a month or two later, we told some of Sergio's family via prayer before a dinner one night. Hubby volunteered to say grace and slipped in a special shout out to the Man above for blessing us with a baby. Everyone was squealing with happiness. We couldn't be more blessed.

30 Weeks....Wowza

How far along? 30 weeks. 6-10 more weeks left! Maybe I should pack the hospital bag soon.

Total weight gain: 35+ pounds. I am shameful.

Maternity clothes? My work attire consists of the same 2 pair of work pants, leggings, and jeans with any top that is willing to fit my growing belly. I finally invested in some good work shoes, too.

Stretch marks? I Heart my Burt's Bees Belly Butter

Sleep: Backaches and heartburn is keeping me up all night.

Best moment this week: Getting my new shoes in the mail. I can wear something other than flip flops now. This is big news for my kankles!

Miss Anything? Sleeping on my back, having energy, my ankles, and NOT being swollen.

Movement: Some days Baby is active.

Food cravings: Sees Chocolates and pancakes. Not together, but that's a great idea!

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing at the moment
Gender predictions: Even though everyone says boy, I feel like it's a girl.

Labor Signs: Not yet

Symptoms: Major swelling in my legs still, constipation from my Iron supplements (whoo hoo.), moodiness, and major fatigue.

Belly Button in or out? Out

Wedding rings on or off? Off

Happy or Moody most of the time: Moody and stressed from work

Looking forward to: This weekend. Hubby and I are going to stay with my parents and my mom said she'll pamper me so I can relax and de-stress. How awesome is she? She already took my order for what I want to eat!

Yipee! Trimester Three!

Can my cheeks BE any bigger? Let's hope not.

How far along? 27 weeks. Some sites say I'm in my third trimester. WHOA!

Total weight gain: Not gonna tell!

Maternity clothes? Found some great work capris at Gap Maternity for $14. I will be wearing them everyday. Think my students will notice?

Stretch marks? Still rubbing on my Belly Butter and it's working like a charm.

Sleep: Sleep is good. Taking longer and deeper naps which is bad considering I go back to work next week. I will miss you, Naps!

Best moment this week: Getting my haircut. The heat is not my friend so getting the hair away from my neck is a dream!

Miss Anything? Sleeping on my back, sushi, and fitting into my old pants.

Movement: Baby is kicking, flipping, and hiccuping a lot still. 

Food cravings: Veggies! This is great. Hopefully I wont back on too much more weight.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing at the moment
Gender predictions: This week I've been getting a lot of people saying it's a boy.

Labor Signs: I think I had some Braxton Hicks this week. Not sure.

Symptoms: Major swelling in my legs. Had to go to the hospital. No fun.

Belly Button in or out? Half flat and half out. It's a Floutie!

Wedding rings on or off? Rockin' my 1.5 carat of fakeness. I miss my real rings.

Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy with a chance of moody. Depends on the day. 

Looking forward to: I'm not sure at the moment but I'm NOT looking forward to going back to work with this heat wave.

 

I've been swollen. Can you tell? No like REALLY swollen. This heat has caused my legs and ankles to swell up real good. This week it got pretty scary because only one leg decided to swell, which is dangerous sometimes. Apparently, this could mean I might have blood clots which is common in pregnancy. Did not know that.

 

Last Friday, I had enough. It was painful to walk and my friends and family were starting to notice, so I decided to call the Doctor. They told me to go into Labor and Delivery right away! I didn't think it was that serious until they admitted me, strapped my belly up to the monitors, and ordered a series of blood tests and ultrasounds.

I was there for almost 5 hours. The good thing was that I was strapped to a fetal monitor and got to hear my baby's heartbeat  the whole time. It was music to my ears. I could listen to that forever.

 

The bad thing was I was there for 4 hours WAITING on results, WAITING for them to do ultrasounds on my legs, and WAITING for my phone to get reception so I could call my hubby. He was so freaked out that he rushed to me from work because he hadn't heard from me since I was admitted. I was also very hungry. If I knew I was going to be waiting that long I would've packed a burger in my purse.

 



Thank God everything turned out to be ok. The ultrasounds and blood tests came out fine. The doctor said it might be a combination of the heat and the way the baby is sitting. I also have Scoliosis which could have something to do with it. The pressure of all the weight is no good for my sensitive back.

 

I've made a few changes since then that seem to help the swelling situation.

1. Wearing compression socks- They are supposed to help with the circulation  in your legs and help prevent fatigue.

 2. Belly Support- This is going to be a lifesaver since I'll be on my feet all day. It very much relieves the pressure on my back and legs.



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3. More Water, Less Salt- I've really been watching my sodium intake. No more fries or chips for this preggo. I've been guzzling water like a fish, too and it's been working wonders for my new kankles. I hate my new kankles.


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 Hope none of you are experiencing this, but if you do, hope this helps.

25 Weeks!

How far along? 25 weeks

Total weight gain: 20+lbs. Trying to eat a bit healthier these days. Chocolate is healthy right?

Maternity clothes? Chillin' at home this week so workout gear and bathing suits are my uniforms

Stretch marks? Nope

Sleep: Waking up to pee ALOT! *Note to self: Remind hubby to put toliet seat DOWN!*

Best moment this week: Letting my mom and my nephew feel Baby kick. So exciting to see their faces.

Miss Anything? Running and sleeping on my back.

Movement: I'm pretty sure I felt Baby punch me. It was more of a sharp jab. I also think Baby wants me to keep moving because Baby was kicking my back to get up off the couch yesterday!

Food cravings: Sweets. CHOCOLATE!! See's chocolate to be exact. Hubby bought me a lot of it. It's dangerous to have around.

Anything making you queasy or sick: The smell of Sonic's doggy treats. This is a new thing. 

Gender predictions: Still feeling like it's a girl. Lots of girl predictions from others this week.

Labor Signs: Not yet

Symptoms: Acid reflux. After scarfing dinner, I feel like I'm going to explode. Need to eat less.

Belly Button in or out? It's still half in and out. Freaky.

Wedding rings on or off? I bought myself a fake ring because sadly mine do not fit anymore. I feel like it's too early for me to be pulling my rings off. :(

Happy or Moody most of the time: Happy and oh so blessed!

Looking forward to: Letting more people feel Baby's kicks. I actually enjoy when friends and family touch my belly. I have yet to have a stranger touch it though. I don't think I would like that.